Submitted by Mike Tracy

Most of us over 65 were Home Schooled in many ways…

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”

My mother taught me RELIGION.

“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL

“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”

My father taught me LOGIC

“Because I said so, that’s why

My mother taught me MORE LOGIC

“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”

My mother taught me FORESIGHT

Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”

My father taught me IRONY

“Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about.”

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS

“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM

“Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”

My mother taught me about STAMINA

“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”

My mother taught me about WEATHER

“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY

“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times, don’t exaggerate!”

My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE

“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION

“Stop acting like your father!”

My mother taught me about ENVY

“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.”

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION

“Just wait until we get home.”

My mother taught me about RECEIVING

“You are going to get it from your father when he gets home!”

My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE

“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.”

My mother taught me ESP

“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”

My father taught me HUMOR

“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”

My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT

“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”

My mother taught me GENETICS

“You’re just like your father.”

My mother taught me about my ROOTS

“Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”

My mother taught me WISDOM

“When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”

My father taught me about JUSTICE

“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!”

by Mira Reverente

For some, the sense of belonging and community was a draw.

Guinevere Heath just moved to Ojai from Ventura, and was looking for some furniture so she composed her first post. In a short amount of time, she received a dresser, shelves, tables and other small furnishings. “I knew I needed to give something back,” she said.

Heath started baking muffins, loaves and cakes, and would drive all over the county to drop off her goods. She loves getting ingredients like flour, sugar, baking powder and the like to sustain her baking because she has zero income from her home bakery due to the pandemic.

Mary Campbell also found herself out of a job when the hair salon she was employed at closed down. Making ends meet by taking on odd jobs like DoorDash, she worried about her 67-year-old mother.

“I am in and out of the house all-day, everyday, bringing in who-knows-what-germs from my jobs,” she said. So she asked the group if anyone had a spare mini-fridge, a hot plate and a coffee maker, so she could keep her compromised mom in another section of the house. In five minutes, she was astounded to receive everything she had asked for.

Calhoun is proud of this tremendous movement, of service-oriented folks just coming together to help and take care of one another. “I worry about the homebound seniors, the immuno-compromised folks and families who are trying to survive on one or zero income,” she said. “I want them to ask for help and connect with someone.”

For Amy Lyons, the group helps soothe the feeling of isolation. A bookkeeper whose hours have been dramatically reduced, Lyons feels at home in this virtual community of selfless strangers. She said, “There’s so much negativity everywhere else, but in Ventura County, we have this.”

The barter system or the exchange of goods and services without money, is nothing new. According to various research, the history of bartering can be traced back to 6000 BC, introduced by Mesopotamian tribes and adopted by Phoenicians and Babylonians. In the US, bartering became hugely popular during the Great Depression due to the scarcity of money.

Gray has vivid memories of bartering in young adulthood, apprenticing with his dad who was a handyman. “I remember him exchanging labor and materials for food, among other things,” said Gray. “Back then, they used the honor system or notes, something you would probably call gift cards nowadays.”

The most requested and posted items are fruits, vegetables, water, baking supplies, cleaning supplies, kids’ art supplies, books, homemade masks and of course, toilet paper. Calhoun said, “I posted on there that members shouldn’t always expect an even trade. It won’t always work that way.”

Post-pandemic, Calhoun sees the group and its mission of service continuing on. She said, “Bartering is a lost art. I want the group to thrive and branch out. I want to see people be of service not only during desperate times, but also when times are good. ”

For more info or to join: www.facebook.com/groups, search for Ventura Free Barter & Trade

Kaiser Permanente announced that John D. Kim has been appointed chief operating officer for the Kaiser Permanente Woodland Hills and West Ventura service areas. John will be responsible for day-to-day hospital operations, continuing care, capital projects, quality/regulatory services and operations support, as well as provide oversight of the West Ventura market.

Previous to this position, John served as the Area Quality Leader and Patient Safety Officer for the Kaiser Permanente South Sacramento service area, comprised of a 241-bed Level II Trauma Center and six medical office buildings. Under his leadership, the hospital was recognized by the AHA/ASA with Stroke Gold Plus Achievement award and Congestive Heart Failure Silver Plus Achievement award; achieved designation as a Primary Stroke Center; and received an A-rating by the Leapfrog Group.

“John has spent more than a decade in hospital leadership within Kaiser Permanente, said Murtaza Sanwari, senior vice president and area manager, Kaiser Permanente Woodland Hills and West Ventura service area. “He brings a wealth of experience in hospital leadership and has a proven track record of success, having worked in Kaiser Permanente’s Southern and Northern California regions.”

John holds both a Doctor of Physical Therapy and Master’s of Healthcare Administration from the University of Southern California.