Lyrics written to the first verse of Alan Sherman’s song “Hello Mother, Hello Father”

by Carol Teitelbaum

Hello, Trump; hello, Pence.
What’s the matter; you’re
making us tense?  Life’s not
very entertaining.  Folks are
dying left and right at your

Get more masks and more gel.
Do it quick before life’s hell.
We need tests and some shots,
before we’re overrun by smart

Life’s not very entertaining.  We
can’t go out even if it’s raining.
It’s upsetting; this whole plague.
And all your answers seem obtuse
and oh so vague.

Wash your hands, 20 seconds.
Keep them off your whole face.
‘Happy Birthday’ is in order.  Make
sure to always have two meters’

Yesterday we had news, just plain
soap is ineffective.  Rather smash
the germs between your hands.
I’m so confused I’m shouting
more invective.

Hello, Trump; hello, Pence, please
wake up, get off the fence.  This
is real, no more lies, no more
deflection and no more disguise.

Life’s not very entertaining.
You’ll be ex officio very soon
cause it’s clear you’re unprepared
and your approval ratings are
just not gaining.

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